Have you ever noticed that some people stretch the truth or embellish a story, or (from your perspective) lie? I’ve thought about this because I know some people who are not always accurate in their storytelling. And maybe that’s ok. (There are probably some psychological reasons or perspective issues.) However, I also know people who look you straight in the eyes and lie to you. Once a lie gets spun, it’s often difficult to reverse the damage and get the truth. As Winston Churchill said,
A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.
Native American tribes called this “speaking with forked tongue“ — a person found guilty of this was no longer considered worthy of trust. This phrase became popular in early America as well — if you spoke with a straight tongue, you told the truth, forked tongue, you lied. I hate snakes, but the visual is perfect.
I remember a little phrase we used to say to kids on the playground — when we caught them lying: “Liar Liar, pants on fire.”
Why Lying is so Bad
When a person lies to you, it’s difficult to trust that person again. And you may not want to. Hugh Nibley explained why deceit is evil —
…the great evil of deception by the word is that Satan was a liar from the beginning. He is the one who loves and makes a lie. If I start telling you what my universe is, you have no right to contradict me. If I tell you what I see, what I hear, and what I remember, and I’m lying to you, I’ve thrown everything away. There’s no world between us; there’s no universe. I’ve brought confusion upon the whole plan of raising God’s children up — the plan by which he spread his glory. Remember “this is my work and my glory.”
So Satan is the old deceiver and the destroyer, but he’s the one who love and makes a lie. How easy it is to do, but what a great offense that is. A person takes it for granted you mean what you say, but he has no means of knowing whether you do or not because good liars are very clever. It takes such an important part in Shakespeare’s plays, the deception that builds. And it leads to tragedy all the time. Somebody lies, and then you are in real trouble. Ref: Teachings of the Pearl of Great Price, Lecture 10, pg 125 -126
Lying Rewires your Brain
Ok, so maybe there is an explanation for why people lie so easily. It seems that your brain rewires and you become more comfortable lying every time after that — the brain adapts to dishonesty:
The findings uncover a biological mechanism that supports a “slippery slope:” what begins as small acts of dishonesty can escalate into larger instances.
How this works is fascinating. At first, your brain — the amygdala — lights up when you tell a lie, and you feel some anxiety about spinning this untruth. The amygdala is the area of the brain that deals with the “fight or flight” response. It is the seat of emotion and behavior. So with the first lie, your amygdala lights up, and you feel a little anxious about telling this lie — but with each succeeding lie, your amygdala calms down. You do not get that feeling of doing something wrong. The evidence that our brains are more plastic than we previously believed can be a good thing or, in the case of deception, a bad thing.
But we can rewire our brains for the better. If you practice being more grateful, the neurons make those connections, and it becomes easier for you to see the good in things. You can become more grateful. More appreciative. The choice is yours.
Ok, enough on liars, lying, and telling a lie. That word has so many variations in spelling when used in a sentence that I kept going back over my writing to make sure I was using it correctly.
